「自分の施しが、周囲から偽善や自己満足と見られるのではないか」という自意識に苛まれたため

A young member of the House of Peers, 'A', who happened to be there, witnessed Senkichi's miserable resignation. A strongly thought, 'I want to let that boy eat his fill of sushi,' but tortured by his self-consciousness that 'my giving alms might be seen by others as hypocrisy or self-satisfaction,' he could not bring himself to speak to him at that moment.